There was this god awful fucking news story I read on FAF awhile back.
What the fuck is wrong with someone that they'd post that...on FAF. I mean, that's atrocity tourism. Jesus christ.
I saw it differently, back then. So much of the godless tripe on FAF read to me like "Hey, let's look at how sorry and godless these miserable pieces of shit are. Let's talk about how much better we are. Let's juxtapose on the moral high ground while describing how horrific and painful and gruesome the rest of their lives should be, and however long or short they should be, and with utter sadomasochistic glee. Then let's argue about who's being soft on them."
But of course, I was wrong.
Also, what were you wrong about? Do tell
Everything.
I am a fucking idiot. All those hours and days spent losing my head over and obsessing on all of them for their antics and the shit they caused and got themselves into. Foxer421. Zaush. Kibble. Dackstrus. Itomic. Fenrabbit. Blazger. Paiseley. Clayton. And so many more that I can't remember now. I have stalked and harrassed all of them. Hours and hours spent cross referencing information; Consulting law enforcement and lawyer acquaintances; Contacting them directly and everyone involved in whatever shit they got in; Collecting real life information and docs; Giving and constantly revising psychological assessments; Figuring out what was bullshit and what wasn't. All of it.
I have forgotten so much fucking more than FD_2, /furi/, or the now defunct WYS will ever learn. But it was all worth nothing. Fucking. Nothing.
I was wrong about every last damned thing, and even if by coincidence, I was right: I was still in the wrong. Stalking. Harrassing. That's all I ever did to Zaush. To his friends. To Ferality, and her friends. And all the victims she named of his. And Keovi. And Cinnemon. Everyone Zaush or Ferality even barely knew, or was named. It's exactly the same thing I did to Dackstrus. To everyone he knew. The same thing I did to foxer421. And Blazger, and Angelo. All of them. It's what I've done to all of them and so many fucking more. Stalking. Harrassing. That's all I ever did. And from it, I learned and accomplished nothing. All that shit I deluded myself into thinking was research and investigation and analysis was nothing more than stalking and harrassing and I achieved nothing.
I was wrong about them, I was wrong to go the lengthes I did, wrong for letting stupid, petty, miserable furry bullshit get to me and I was wrong about Clayton. So fucking wrong.
I was wrong about everything, and I am a stupid fucking idiot. And regardless of anything, I do not want to care about this shit anymore.
Why didn't I make a fool of myself on /furi/ sooner? Why didn't I get it over with sooner?
God damn me.