Convention Gangbang 101, with Professor Taryn

[Pi]

Taryn the internet red panda is trying to scare up interest in his convention-gangbang fetish. What follows is suitable only for mature audiences with strong stomachs.

Now, I know that people have lots of misconceptions about last year's party, so I'd like to go ahead and clear that up for you all. It's not a come one, come all sort of deal. This event is (and always will be) invite-only. For some reason, people like to believe that anyone who just wanted to waltz right on in could have a turn... but yeah, that's not the case. If you want to come to the party, you need to RSVP by contacting me in one way or another.

For some reason, people thought that his gay bareback gang fuck was a slutty event. We just can't have that now, can we? Instead, you've gotta reserve your place in his ass. Classy.

The second misconception is that my party was a crazy, free-for-all bareback fuckfest. XD In all honesty, only one person actually did the deed, if you know what I mean. The reason it came off as otherwise was probably because I exaggerated just a bit to make it out like the party was a huge success. About 15 or so people showed up, but most of 'em just came to watch.

The reasoning here sounds like "In addition to people thinking it's a slutty event (which it totally isn't!!!!!) I am disappointed that I only got one load of jizz up my prone ass. I lied about how much action I got and now people think I'm a manwhore (which I'm totally not!!!!!)."

My professional opinion, Taryn, is that you are bringing it upon yourself.

With that said, there are lots of misconceptions and assumptions about last year's events (and myself, heh), and as a result, I've ended up with a pretty bad reputation. Well, I'm doing my best to correct that, and let people see who I am beneath my kinkiness. X3 As naughty as I am, I still am quite responsible, and always play responsibly. You know, like the lottery. Or something. c.c

I'd think that these are reasonable (mis|pre)conceptions and assumptions to have. Is there a way to pull off "bukkake gang bang" without coming off as kind of a sex whore?

Additionally I'm not sure "sexual responsibility" and "bareback gangbang" can be uttered in the same sentence.

~ The purpose of this party is simple. Taryn the red panda is going to be in the middle of a bukkake gang-bang. Oh my! What fun. X3

But it's not a crazy free-for-all bareback thing. Instead you get to choose where you spurt. Is this somehow going to make everything better?

~ The party is invite-only. There will be a guest list, and if you wish to be on it, you'll need to RSVP in advance by contacting Taryn in one way or another. Each person on the guest list may bring one additional guest, who does not have to be on the list. Please provide Taryn with what name will be on your badge, as well as your preference on pictures and videos. (See below~)

Is this a gangbang or a formal dress party?

~ If you (or someone) is for some reason unable to RSVP in advance, but still would like to attend, contact Taryn while at the convention to receive a special pass to grant you access! However, this won't allow you to bring an additional guest. Sowwie. D:

You can't bring an additional guest, but the additional guest can just pretend not to know you for a few minutes, find the guy later and get into his assparty that way, apparently. Way to maintain a secure guest list.

~ The location of the party will be texted to those on the guest list during Anthrocon. Please provide your cell phone number when you RSVP, or find Taryn at the convention to ask. If your phone does not receive text messages, let Taryn know, and he'll give you a call, instead. :3

Here it is, your inner glimpse at the logistics behind organizing furries that wish to blow their load in/on you. Let's take notes.

~ There will be pictures and video taken at the party, so that those who do not attend can still enjoy. :3 If you are uncomfortable with this, you shouldn't attend. However, we will take into consideration the fact that not everyone wants their faces shown. So, if you wish your face to not be visible in pictures and video, please say so when you RSVP. If you do not wish to be in photos or video at all, then you shouldn't attend.

That's not good enough for me. I want signed and notarized model releases and 18 USC 2257 information kept for future records, like any other porn studio.

~ There is an entry free... and this is only to encourage those who attend to be a bit more... active in the party, since last year, the vast majority just stood around. If you want to attend, you'll need to cum at least once, on (or in) the red panda. Pretty simple, right? :3 So if you want to just watch, well... you'll need to at least fap and aim on the wah just once, and then you can sit back and be an observer, if you so choose. ^^

You, too, can pay for the dubious privilege of busting a nut in this guy. Astounding. I'm not a lawyer, but doesn't this amount to prostitution?

Edit: I believe I originally misread this. It's not a monetary fee, durrr. You've just gotta get your cream on his body.

I also like how he lowered his standards from last year. Maybe I'll dig up that post.

~ The party is NOT bareback-only, although it is preferred. However, if you are wanting to mount the red panda sans protection, you will NEED to have complete test results received within a month prior to Anthrocon 2009 in order to do so. Taryn will also have test results on-hand and readily viewable. If you do decide to bareback, that is your own responsibility, and do it at your own risk. Taryn have the right to say "no" to anyone, and he more than likely will to a few. He doesn't lift tail for absolutely anyone, as much as his reputation might say otherwise. ^^; Please don't be offended if Taryn declines.

Here we go with some more "i'm responsible really!" talk. Also it's a little late to be posting this, considering that AC is in 2 and a half weeks. That somewhat tarnishes the claim of being responsible.

~ If you wish to use protection, please bring your own (as well as your lube of preference, please). We won't be able to cater to everyone's... *ahem* ... you know... size. ^^; It's also requested that if you're using protection, you pull out and cum on the red panda somewhere. We shouldn't let any spoo go to waste. XD

~ No alcohol or food will be present at the party. If you wish to have something to drink or eat, please do so in advance.

Awww, but everyone knows that pizza and beer goes great with jizz.

I'm imagining what would happen if he didn't disclaim this, and the image is kind of very horrifying.

~ This party is meant to be an all-on-one sorta deal. If you're wanting to play with someone else, please take it to your own room. Having that said, if you have personal agenda with someone else who is the room, we ask that you please shove those differences aside and try to have a good time. If you wish to create drama or resolve issues between you and another person present at the party, please do it some place else.

Remember, this is a bareback gangbang, and you can't turn it into an orgy or a disagreement. You should be able to shove aside all your differences with other people in the name of shoving your dick into this one. How egocentric.

~ You must present a valid form of identification to be allowed inside, as well as your con badge. No one under 18 will be admitted.

Because you are trained in discerning valid forms of identification versus some dude with a card printer and a plausible template.

~ We have the right to remove anyone from the party at any time, for any reason... so please, don't give us a reason. This is all in good fun. Let's have a great time, everyone! ^.~

It's like an exclusive club, with bouncers and everything.

Hope to see you guys there~! :3

I hope not.

Ah, and for those of you who uh... don't remember who I am, for some reason... here's my xt00bs.

http://x02test.xtube.com/community/profile.php?user=mahoumikekun for the record. Features video of last year's bareback gangbang, the one where only one guy out of the fifteen in the room actually came.

~ Taryn the Wahboi ~

Can someone remove his tilde key and do something appropriately inappropriate with it?

[Captain Cowgirl]

oh wow



where was this posted, by the way?

[Pi]

Look at his LJ user info and assume any community obviously furry-related got a copy of this.

[Pi]

This came up as a response to him on one of the other internet furry sex communities:

Your reputation probably also has to do something with the fact you'll crash any yiffy room party that you're not the center of attention at. Such as, for example, when you showed up more than an hour after the party at FWA started with three people (none of whom even seemed to know what kind of party it was), then wouldn't shut up about every person you'd had sex with in the previous six months while completely ignoring the two naked people on the bed. Then you got offended when I asked you to leave and blamed it on your "reputation" instead of realizing that you were being an ass. I ran into one of your friends the next day and he actually apologized for your behavior, which is more than I think you've ever done yourself when confronted about your behavior. So your "reputation" is not just based on ancient history; there are plenty of recent events that have solidified that as being more than mere rumor.

I'll be surprised if this comment isn't deleted by you or one of the admins by the time I wake up tomorrow morning, but someone had to call you out on being a dick in addition to being wildly irresponsible with your sexual activities. Might as well be me; I don't exactly have anything to lose.

[ProvincialTwit]

This guy is a trainwreck of HIV just waiting to happen.

I mean if he's really this desperate to live out some sort of drowning-in-manchowder fantasy he should just raid a sperm bank and be done with it.

[Freehaven]

You know how some furries are always going on about weeding out the undesirable element from the fandom?

This guy shouldn't be weeded out, he should be kicked out.  Of a plane.  Without a parachute.

[Pi]

As a reply to the Some Dude up there comes this missive, dripping with queeniness:

    Hmm, actually, the guys I brought knew it was a yiffy party... We weren't trying to "crash" it, like you accuse me of, hon. Maybe if we had been attracted to the the naked guys we saw on the bed, something would've happened. ^^; I tried to initiate stuffs by grinding on my mate, but that's when you started getting ready to leave and said we needed to go, too. o.o *Shrugs*

    I'm really not interested in everything with a dick, yanno. Just because it's there, it doesn't mean I wanna play with it. x3 I'm pretty picky, actually. o.o;

    I dunno... to me, it just seems like you're really jealous or something, and I'm sorry that you feel that way. I really don't try to do anything to be the "center of attention", but I guess I can take that as a compliment. I didn't think it was possible to become the "center of attention" at a party with two people, anyway. XD *Hugs tight* All I did was show up, and add three people to the two who were at your party. You decided to end it before things got heated. >;3 *Giggles*

    Regardless of what you might think or say about me, I know I'm a good person, and I am a responsible one, and those who have taken the time to get to know me know that this is the case. I'm sorry that you're blocking yourself from seeing this, but that's your own decision. I still consider you my friend, whether or not it's reciprocated. I hope you have a great time at the convention, sweetie! :3

I'm... The smug "i think my gangbang was totally better than your yiffy party and i'm gonna rub your nose in it" he's putting off is just astounding.

[Pi]

Here's a link to a 4 fucking megabyte .png screencap consisting of what the usually-awful furaffinity forums think of him.

And now that the FA thread has been closed:
http://files.getdropbox.com/u/129462/lolwat/taryn1/showthread.php.htm
http://files.getdropbox.com/u/129462/lolwat/taryn2/showthread.php.htm

[Freehaven]

I've gotta wonder if the idiot's still going to go through with it now.  Or if the con staff will actually do something to stop it.

[Pi]

The guy's furry wikipedia page is full of glowing praise and cutesy :words:. Guess who 75% of the edits were made by?

I'll guess that he's still going to go through with it. After all, he's such a great person inside that he has to continuously repeat it so that anyone can see that it's just other people trying to tarnish his reputation by claiming that he's an irresponsible man-whore, and not his actions making him look like an irresponsible man-whore. It's narcissistic escapism at it's finest.

[Freehaven]

You know, at least when I did my article on WikiFur, I didn't blow smoke up anyone's ass about me being a great person or anything like that.

Doesn't surprise me that he did most of the edits to his article, though.  I doubt anyone would have even cared enough to make it if he hadn't.

And if he's still planning on going through with the room orgy party, one has to wonder if the con staff has anything to say about it, aside from an ass-covering "if it doesn't happen on the con floor we don't give a damn" statement.

[Pi]

It just keeps getting better (sourced from lulz.net).

http://files.getdropbox.com/u/129462/lolwat/Kraven%27s%20Ramblings%20-%20Tsk%20tsk%2C%20some%20people..._1245205294729.png
Some dude on LJ calls him out (of course he's passive-aggressive about it at first) on having an STD and being incapable of getting a boner.

http://files.getdropbox.com/u/129462/lolwat/Kraven%27s%20Ramblings%20-%20lolwut%20text%20_1245205514799.jpg
Same dude gets a text message from Taryn a few days later, who wishes to be "leaking with 20+ guys' loads"

[Freehaven]

Christ, this is just sad on about twenty different levels.

[Pi]

From lulz, but no doubt copy-pasted verbatim to several other threads, since he can't creatively respond to more than one piece of criticism.

    Well, I suppose if this were a contest, you all have won... but before I get to that, let me clarify a few things. This was not a public free-for-all on my ass, this was an invite-only event for trusted friends. (Not that I can say that much for all of you who usually find your hookups on craigslist, x-tube, or pounced.) My post was made on a private forum for those people to know how to attend. Second, the "entry fee", which you all seem to think was monetary, was actually ejaculate, so unless the Federal Reserve has been moved to the sperm bank, I don't see anything legally wrong with that. Lastly, as this was posted on a private board and some whiney retard decided to make it public, it seems the whole world knows about something that I would have liked to keep private. I hope that makes you feel really good about yourself. I really do, because if my expense were for nothing, there'd be no value in that.

    So, you win the "contest". All of you shit-eating, lactating-nipple sucking, diaper-wearing, dick-girl loving, pony-playing, axilating jerks with the 8-inch strap-on attached to your girlfriend and shoved-up-your-ass people get to have your fantasies fulfilled... and I don't. So thanks. I had an opportunity to do so, but unfortunately having group sex is way too much for some to handle, and they felt the need to let the whole world know. (You still better feel great about this, really.) To everyone else who decided to participate in this little debacle, I really hope you got something out of this, too. I know I did: Loads of grief, depression, and the sinking feeling that nobody has enough time on their hands to do something productive, rather than badger some random guy who you probably don't even know. It's alright, I was always told immature people were quick to judge... Guess I was told right. I guess I learned my lesson. Apparently, I've got to keep things more private than private forums that deal only with sex. Apparently other people with other fantasies just aren't trustworthy.

    Long and short: Party is cancelled, and not like any of you randoms were getting in anyway. For the record, I'm not going anywhere. Just because I've cancelled, it doesn't mean I'm leaving the fandom. Nor does it mean I'm not going to AC and having a great time. I'm not a nymphomaniac, nor am I obsessed with having this little secret of mine fulfilled. (Well, not really a secret any more, thanks to someone who will be riding their high-horse all the way to Pittsburgh.) With that, I'd like to bid you all adieu, and let you know that the only reason this has bothered me in the least is because some people can't leave things where they belong, in private. (I certainly hope it still feels great, though!)

    Later.

I don't believe for a single second any of it, and he appears to have missed the point entirely; nobody cares any more whether or not he has a zillion STD's or likes to gargle jizz. Majority opinion seems to be that he's endangering other people and not caring about it so long as he's got his jizz-quota for the day.

[Kindrift]

Forgive me in advance, if anyone feels that it is inappropriate for me to be posting it here. However, I have been forced to stand up against a tidal wave of bullshit flaming and drama because someone decided to take my post about my party, which was only posted in three members-only sex-based furry communities, and make it public. Now, not only does the entire fandom know about my private party plans at AC, but so do my non-furry friends. So please, I suggest you all read this. I feel like my privacy has been violated. I never posted this publicly... I thought that this was a place where I could express my sexuality without ridicule or worry about this being posted elsewhere. I think people should learn to give respect to everyone within communities such as these, just as I provide the same to you all.

This community is not your personal sounding board.
This community is for the posting of pictures... of your cock.
Nothing more, nothing less.
I am deleting this post, as it has nothing to do with pictures of cock.

Does anyone like this guy?  Hey, Taryn, it's not that you have dreams of sucking off 20 dudes at once, the bigger problem's your personality.  Not many people like an egocentric queeny mole-person.

[Freehaven]

Does anyone like this guy?

Not that I can think of.  Even Lulz hates this guy.  (Then again, Lulz hates everybody, so...yeah.)

[Kindrift]

What you meant to say was "even FurAffinity hates this guy."  Anyway, his party is almost certainly not canceled, but possibly moved.  The kid needs this way too much.

[Freehaven]

Anyway, his party is almost certainly not canceled, but possibly moved.  The kid needs this way too much.

Yeah, this wouldn't surprise me.  The guy is just too damn desperate to just outright cancel his orgy party.

I'm hoping no one shows up now, though, just to make his failure complete.

Or, if people do show up, and the cops are lurking about at AC thanks to Alan the Pedophile Panda...well, you can see where I'm going with this.

[Kindrift]

Yeah, going straight to your sad revenge fantasy.

[Pi]

From Lulz:



I am jack's complete lack of surprise, assuming it's true.