Ash-Fox can't get his game published.

[Pi]

NB: I've gotten mixed reviews as to the hilarity of this. It's mostly here as a documentation thing.

So, the sperg is high with this one. I'll let the (mildly-edited-for-clarity) chat log speak for itself, mostly.

<+Ash-Fox> You know what takes longer than compiling a game with 1.5GB of content data?
<+Ash-Fox> Waiting for the fucking installer software to compress it so you can distribute it
<+Sammy> so what, it's a furry game where you go around fucking people in the ass in HIGH RESOLUTION GRAPHIXZ and lots of sound effects?
<+Ash-Fox> Sammy, no.
<+Ash-Fox> Sammy, it's not a furry game.
<+Ash-Fox> And I am going to get raped by the BBFA
<+Ash-Fox> They're going to charge me ludicrous fees just so I can get a sticker telling people what ages can play the damn thing so I ca nsell it
<+Ash-Fox> Nur, I tried VALVe, VALVe don't answer me.
<+Ash-Fox> You need to request information before you can do anything
<+Ash-Fox> And they don't give it.
<+Ash-Fox> I could setup a cronjob that e-mails them daily
<Nur> they'll just filter you out
<Pi> yeah that's mature
<Nur> and likely report you to some filtering service
<+Ash-Fox> I doubt they would block google's servers.
<+Ash-Fox> Beyond that, I'm not really willing to put up with more bullshit than what I've already done

Here's where it starts. He's having trouble getting return contact, so clearly, mailflooding is the answer.

<Pi> Ash-Fox: I really doubt that cron-mailing them daily is going to cause anything resembling positive regard
<+Ash-Fox> My time is better spent doing other things.
<+Ash-Fox> Pi, worse case scenario, they don't respond
<+Ash-Fox> Pi, thus, I fail to see the problem
<+Ash-Fox> Since 1) Doing nothing - no response 2) Doing a cron thing - no response - Nothing of value was lost?
<+Ash-Fox> Fix: Since 1) sending them various unique e-mails - no response 2) Doing nothing - no response 2) Doing a cron thing - no response - Nothing of value was lost?
<Pi> Ash-Fox: what possible purpose could daily-cron-mailing them serve
<Pi> other than mildly irritating them
<+Ash-Fox> Pi, a higher chance that they might notice it
<Pi> not really
<+Ash-Fox> Pi, statistically speaking, they may notice it.
<Pi> more what I think will happen is some people will get together and say "hey this dickhead is cron-mailing us daily" and your name will become mud
<+Ash-Fox> Assuming they get so many e-mails that they just ignore the mjaority of them
<+Ash-Fox> Pi, yeah, because there is this big secret organisation that distribute a blacklist
<Pi> Ash-Fox: no, because "people talk to each other"
<+Ash-Fox> Pi, I'd rather take my chances than not do anything.
<+Ash-Fox> I also didn't mention daily, did I?
<+Ash-Fox> You're the one who came up with "daily".
<Pi> [11:51:29] <+Ash-Fox> I could setup a cronjob that e-mails them daily
<Pi> yes, you did
<+Ash-Fox> Could, not will.
<Pi> now you're just nitpicking
<+Ash-Fox> No, I'm not.

Hooo boy. If his game is designed at all like how he acts, it's no small wonder he's having trouble getting it published. Also, loldenial+semantic-wanking === profit!!!

<Pi> Ash-Fox, as I see it, either your game sucks and they're too busy to tell you about it, or you're an asshole and they don't want to deal with it
<Pi> evidenced by the fact that you think daily cron-mailing is even an OPTION
<+Ash-Fox> Pi, fortunately, your opinion doesn't mean much.
<Pi> wow, i would never have known that if you hadn't told me
<+Ash-Fox> Pi, that's the best come back you can up with? lol.
<Pi> and "fortunately, your opinion doesn't mean much" is yours?
<+Ash-Fox> Not really much of an opinion as it is fact. You're not exactly someone that highly graded by society where your opinion actually means something.

"YOUR NOT HIGHLY INTERNET RATED HAW HAW HAW!!!!!" -- ash fox

[LordNagetiere]

Starting a game as a money-making scheme actually isn't that difficult if it's half decent. I mean hell, there are guys like Sean O'Conner who basically rip ideas off board games and other titles, but repackages it and sells them in big bundles. There are plenty of companies that make 5 or 10 dollar games where you can download a deceptive sort of 'demo' version online, one with a ton of ingame ads for "WANT MORE CONTENT HUH, LIKE THAT REALLY COOL GUN? BUY IT JACKASS!". The problem is they usually have to constantly stream new games to actually make any money worth a damn.

[nobuyuki]

bumpan ages old thread


From what I heard, Valve likes to actually try the games that people want to see distributed via steam before they actually go through the considerations and all that other BS.  They might also be playing it safe if you make casual games or w/e.  Steamworks API is right there for this guy to use, but I didn't see any indication that he was proactively utilizing it or anything like that (disclaimer : I don't know shit about ash-fox's game)

Valve didn't respond back to the guys I work with now until their game started making marks on a different portal, but when they did finally respond back, from what I understand they had already tested the game and everything.  This guy should really be considering if he's really serious eating a little humble pie and going to a less-glamorous games portal that will publish his game -- it is likely depending on the genre it will sell even better than it would on Steam

☆ミ The More You Know

[GreenReaper]

Speaking as one of the guys who helps out with packaging games for a major game distribution network, sending us identical emails on a daily basis is a great way to get spam-filed.

Honestly, until there's a more automated way of putting games up (we're working on it . . .), he's probably screwed anyway, because it probably wouldn't be worth us spending the time to set his game up. As nobuyuki said, Steam is the wrong venue.