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Messages - Pi

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Nazi Furs Fuck Off / Re: RMFC really puts it's foot in it
« on: April 11, 2017, 10:24:39 pm »
Man, I haven't thought of ScorchGD (one of the dudes involved in this, i forget his legal name and thus his role in this entire fiasco, maybe someone else can fill that in) in the longest time. All I knew about him a few years ago was that he believed he could, like, build perpetual motion machines. That, and I got banned from the furaffinity IRC channel on furnet for yelling at him about how that's completely impossible too loudly.

Nazi Furs Fuck Off / Re: RMFC really puts it's foot in it
« on: January 31, 2017, 11:35:52 pm »
One of my non-furry friends reports:

<a> welp i just saw my first nazi fursuit
<a> and it wasn't even retweeted by a furry                                                                                 
<a> the guy that wrote that badass What is Code Bloomberg mag just started throwing so much shade at this altfur fuckhole
<Pi> is it that Foxler guy
<a> yeah

i don't like your particular brand of self-loathing so you get an asinine title

last i heard she does all her modding from a shadow account, but i haven't paid attention in a while

Antisocial Networking / Re: Oops, FA Got Hacked (Again)
« on: October 14, 2016, 09:55:01 pm »
A hashed password is a password that has been encrypted. When you log into FA, it encrypts whatever you typed in against the salt and compares the outcome to the one stored in the database. If they match, it logs you in.
basically right but you keep saying encrypted where you mean hashed

Scandal! / Re: "CisScummery is at a near intolerable level"
« on: July 10, 2016, 10:24:08 pm »
~~fuckity bye~~

Scandal! / Re: "CisScummery is at a near intolerable level"
« on: July 10, 2016, 10:17:35 pm »
And Pi, how would you feel if I waged a whiner war against you for having that fast flashing GIF as your avatar? -- "Hey, I've got e
you are an incredibly tedious clod

Scandal! / Re: "CisScummery is at a near intolerable level"
« on: July 10, 2016, 08:09:08 pm »
Right, like y'all bagged on Green Reaper and insta-labled him a "transphobic bigot"
okay so

greenreaper's habit of saying "i don't care what pronouns you use, i'm going to call you 'he' if i want to" is practically the definition of transphobic bigotry, so the label is quite deserved tyvm

Scandal! / Re: "CisScummery is at a near intolerable level"
« on: July 10, 2016, 05:48:31 pm »
remind me why i'm supposed to care about anything you have to say, again?

Scandal! / Re: "CisScummery is at a near intolerable level"
« on: July 07, 2016, 07:45:16 pm »
Kiiiiiiinda makes ya miss the old e621 userbase
which actually still had a sense of humor

Jesus fucking christ, that shit doesn't even fit in a single post here.

Anyway, look at that thing. I'm struggling to imagine a more predatory, antisocial approach on a dating site. Neither the kind of person who would offer this contract or the kind of person who would sign it are the sort of person who should sign such a thing. Also it's fucking adorable how he thinks there's some kind of legal action possible for copying that massive block of drivel.

Bring the lawsuit, chucklefuck.


Section 3:


1. The submissive/slave upon entering servitude to the master and through the duration of the contract shall be guaranteed from him the following basic rights at all times:

A: The submissive/slave shall always be granted access to the bare essentials, under no circumstance during servitude will the submissive/slave be denied food and shelter. They shall never go hungry nor shall they be deprived a warm and safe place to sleep. 

B: The submissive/slave shall never be subjected to an unsafe environment. They shall never be made to endure grievous bodily harm, psychological trauma nor risk to life. They shall not be made to perform any illegal actions or otherwise subjected to any undue discomfort and danger.

C: The submissive/slave, if injured or ill or in a state of recovery and rehabilitation for any reason shall not be subjected to unnecessary strain. They shall be granted appropriate time off from work both at home and not, to rest and heal if in any way incapacitated or indisposed.

D: The submissive/slave shall never be bought, sold or rented to another master/mistress or other person. They shall neither be traded nor shared and in no way made to perform services of any kind for or with another person or party.

E: The submissive/slave shall never be made to compete for affection or favor with any other submissive/slave, spouse or other person. They shall be the only submissive/slave to serve the master, his one and only romantic interest and in turn shall receive the bulk of his free attention.

2. For faithful and or exceptional performance in servitude the submissive/slave may be rewarded in the following ways:

A: The submissive/slave when there are no jobs to perform or duties to fill, may be granted a period free time. Time to spend with friends and family or pursue personal interests provided they do not conflict with the master's needs or wishes.

B: The submissive/slave may be granted occasional access to a limited portion of the savings accumulated for personal purposes. They may use such to make purchases of non vital nature and for their own pleasure provided said purchases do not in any way inconvenience or upset the master. 

C: The submissive/slave if not already in possession of an approved pet may choose to have a puppy or adult dog for themselves provided it meets the master's guidelines for one.

D: The submissive/slave may choose to be relieved of their least favorite duty at home for a day. If they are employed and have accumulated any vacation or sick days they may also choose not to attend work if scheduled to do so that day. 

3. For deliberate disobedience both minor and major, for neglecting duties or failure to meet any agreed terms and conditions of servitude submissive/slave will be subject to the following consequences:

A: If the submissive/slave neglects one or more duties without a suitable reason shall have one or more previously awarded privileges revoked. Basic rights however cannot be revoked or rescinded so long as the contract stands.

B: Any and all punishment or penalty shall be proportional to the degree and nature of whatever offense may take place. This can vary from physical punishment such as spanking or being restrained and immobilized to psychological punishment through withheld affection or being denied some other form of pleasure unrelated to basic survival. Any and all punishments or penalties shall only be temporary and not enforced for extended periods.

C: If the master's rules are continuously and blatantly disregarded, if he or any of his property are disrespected or damaged as a result consequences will be more swift, severe and longer lasting. This may include an increase to the daily workload or introduction of new tasks the submissive/slave will likely not enjoy in addition to more significant privilege suspension or loss.

D: If it should become apparent master and submissive/slave simply are not compatible and one cannot or will not suit the needs of the other, contract shall thereby be terminated. The submissive/slave at such point will be free to serve another owner or embark upon an entirely different path through life. If the submissive/slave should for any reason withdraw from service to the master and leave his home they shall only depart with what was initially brought with them and what was legitimately earned during their length of stay.


Section 4:


   The submissive/slave has thoroughly read and understood the language in this document. The submissive/slave as such agrees to the terms and conditions therein before signing. At this time the submissive/slave is of a sober and sound mind under no coercion through intoxicating substances, monetary extortion or physical threat. By signing this contract the submissive/slave provides consent to become the property of the master granting him full legal authority over said property. The submissive/slave does hereby pledge to surrender to him and only him their body, mind and soul along with control of all personal possessions and finances for the duration of living years or until a point is reached where both master and submissive/slave agree to terminate the contract.

Master's signature ________________________ Date ____________

Submissive/slave's signature ________________________ Date ____________

since we're necro'ing bad threads, i just wanna say that i was recently linked to, which i am reproducing in full for reasons which shall soon become clear

Application for submissive/slave to enter service
Species: Canine-Dog(some sort of mangy canine)
Seeking: Long Term
Looking for: Female,Trans


Any and all usage of the following documentation without the complete and unadulterated consent of its author will be reprimanded to the fullest extent of the law.


   Below can be found an application and contract for a submissive/slave to enter service under a master. Any potential submissive/slave interested must read the following and in response provide extensive details about self and explanation of why or how submissive/slave may be suitable for service. If the potential submissive/slave meets eligibility requirements contained within section 1 see section 2. If submissive/slave agrees with daily expectations therein proceed to section 3. If submissive/slave understands and accepts terms of contractual obligation proceed to section 4. Document in its entirety is to be printed out and signed by potential submissive/slave upon consenting to enter servitude. Proof of such must be provided to the master before service may begin. If all is in order the submissive/slave will immediately relocate to enter servitude bringing their copy of the documentation to the master to apply his signature and finalize contract.


Section 1:


1. The submissive/slave must be no younger than eighteen years of age and no older than fifty years of age to enter service due to legality and health or longevity issues.

2. The submissive/slave must not be a felon or on probation and must have no criminal record. They must not be a user of methamphetamine or other hard drugs or associate with those who do.

3. The submissive/slave must not currently have any romantic or intimate involvement with another person or owner. They also must have no such involvement with anyone but the master during servitude.

4. The submissive/slave must have no serious or life threatening conditions that require special medicine or assistance. They must be able to reliably perform duties without medical aid or equipment. They must also be free of contagious or sexually transmitted diseases and possess a strong, active libido.

5. The submissive/slave must be neither dangerously under or over weight. They must be within a reasonable or healthy range of no less than one hundred pounds and not more than three hundred pounds with no set number. The submissive/slave must strive to remain near what would be considered an appropriate weight for them based on height among other factors.

6. The submissive/slave must be a passable pre op transgender woman. Exceptions to this however, can be made in the event of the following:

A: The submissive/slave, if post op or is biologically born female must be capable of and enjoy or even prefer anal intercourse. If capable of becoming pregnant the submissive/slave must take any and all measures deemed necessary to prevent pregnancy up to and including permanent surgery.

B: The submissive/slave, if a crossdresser or otherwise feminine male that is anything less than a full time female must legally change name and identity to present as a woman indefinitely. They must exhibit no masculine features or behavior at any time. They must take any and all measures deemed necessary to maintain suitable femininity up to and including prescription hormones. 

7. The submissive/slave must have no affiliation with any religious or political party for any reason at any time. They must not attend any church or rallies, must not support or worship anything related. Religion and politics must never be brought up, mentioned or practiced in any way whatsoever.

8. The submissive/slave must be mobile having a drivers license and vehicle before entering service. They must be able to relocate themselves and perform assorted errands afterward. However, exceptions can be made under the following conditions:

A: The submissive/slave must be legally eligible for driving privileges. They must be able to utilize alternate means if not having a vehicle to come to the master and enter into service.

B: The submissive/slave, if having a license and no vehicle or vice versa must be able to acquire the other. If having neither both must be obtained within a timely fashion after entering service.   

9. The submissive/slave must be able to contribute to the cost of living and bring some manner of income into the house. If able to work but unemployed the submissive/slave must acquire a job of some kind and shall be granted what would be considered a reasonable amount of time to locate one. Stipulations on income and the source thereof are as follows:

A: The submissive/slave is permitted to choose any occupation they wish that does not involve illegal activity or potential infidelity. They must not derive income from drugs or any other forbidden services or goods. They must not be in a position of employ that involves exposing oneself to other men or flirtatiously interacting with them nor fame and notoriety of any kind.

B: The submissive/slave is not required to earn a living through standard employment but may instead receive disability compensation, or other form of steady and legal financial assistance provided said disability does not interfere with or inhibit duty to master.

C: The submissive/slave is permitted only to work part time so as not to neglect the master's needs at home. There is no defined income level and no limitations on how much or how little must be earned so long as the submissive/slave consistently contributes to expenses.

D: The submissive/slave is permitted only approved access to earnings. The submissive/slave must surrender complete control over all income earned and shall make no purchases nor financial decisions without explicit permission from the master.

10. The submissive/slave must only bring a minimal amount of clothing and other personal belongings into the master's home. They must not exceed what would be considered a reasonable amount of space which shall be alloted to them. Included in personal belongings would also be domestic animals or pets. Only under the following conditions will said animal or animals be granted entry into the master's home:

A: The animal must be some manner of dog that has no special needs. It must have no serious health issues, require no unusual diet, maintenance or excessive expense. The animal must also possess a temperament and personality of which the master approves.

B: The animal must be properly trained to follow basic commands and understand its place in the hierarchy of the home. It must provide pleasant companionship and or a non obstructive presence. It must not in any way upset the master and his pets while causing no deliberate or indirect damages to them or to the home. So long as the animal is obedient and respectful the master shall never deny it reasonable treatment, basic care or affection. 


Section 2:


1. The submissive/slave must obey, must be affectionate and be truthful to the master at all times following any orders given to the best of their ability. They must do so without hesitation and without complaint. They must obey the master proudly knowing a job well done is its own reward. It is submissive/slave's duty to fulfill the master's needs whatever they may entail and obey only him.

2. The submissive/slave must never take any unauthorized actions, must never make any decision serious or not without consent from the master. The submissive/slave does not speak unless spoken to. Only if there is an inquiry to be placed, a compliment made or vital information which must be relayed does this change. Additionally the submissive/slave must never disclose any information on activities in the home or words exchanged between master and submissive/slave to outside persons or parties unless specifically permitted by the master.

3. The submissive/slave, if employed outside the home must attend work on time every time as is required to maintain a source of income. All income earned after necessities are covered must be set aside for emergency savings and placed under the master's exclusive management. When performing a job the submissive/slave must not interact excessively with others but only as is necessary to get by. The majority of time off work must be spent in service to the master at home.

4. The submissive/slave must maintain proper grooming and an acceptable state of health at all times. They must be adequately fit and energetic enough to perform the various tasks assigned to them both in and out of the home. They must also maintain an appropriate appearance, scent and smoothness of skin that is pleasing to the master. They must wear work appropriate attire when working outside of the home and attire of which the master approves when not.

5. The submissive/slave must never forget their position and therefore at all times wear a collar. Exception shall only be made if explicitly not permitted by employment. In the case of such the submissive/slave must instead wear a more discreet binding memento and symbol of ownership, of the master's choosing.

6. The submissive/slave must be responsible for their own medical or personal needs. Additionally, any pet related needs should the submissive/slave own a pet. Any medications, doctor visits or procedures are the financial obligation of the submissive/slave including hormones or birth control where applicable. They must also be responsible for additional costs such as clothing, cosmetics or personal hygiene products.

7. The submissive/slave must have a means of being reached when outside the home and general communications access for emergencies. If in possession of one, telephone or cellular service is the responsibility of the submissive/slave. Conditions of cellular or other device usage is as follows:

A: The submissive/slave must regularly pay the monthly bill for said device and must never exceed limitations of the service plan. Data use and time spent must be kept to a strict minimum.

B: Usage of electronic devices not relating to fulfilling duties to the master or an employer shall only be permitted when current duties are complete and never in excess.

C: Communication with persons other than the master must never interfere with the submissive/slave's duties at home. Staying in touch with friends and family or doing one's paid job must never cause the master any inconvenience or displeasure.

8. The submissive/slave, if in possession of transportation must be responsible for any related maintenance or expenses. Any and all costs are the submissive/slave's duty to cover. Conditions of use and relevant obligations are as follows: 

A: The submissive/slave must maintain a drivers license and active insurance for the vehicle while adhering to other legal guidelines. They must also provide general upkeep on the vehicle ranging from fuel and other fluids to tuneup and major repair of said vehicle. If the vehicle is lost or irreparably damaged for any reason it is the submissive/slave's responsibility to obtain a replacement.

B: The submissive/slave must not operate vehicle erratically, without care or while intoxicated. It must not be used for any illegal activities. They must not operate the vehicle in any other dangerous, unlawful or otherwise unnecessary manner.

C: The submissive/slave must only operate vehicle when permitted and for essential purposes. For any personal usage or usage not related to work, or to assigned tasks submissive/slave must first submit a request and obtain master's approval. Only for immediate medical or other less than fleeting concerns shall exception be made.

9. The submissive/slave must be capable of performing all daily tasks assigned to them when not working if employed. Regularly scheduled duties or chores to perform at home are as follows:

A: The submissive/slave, in addition to preparing a breakfast for themselves must be prepared to do so for the master if requested in the morning. If the master is not awake or does not desire to be then only breakfast for the submissive/slave shall be made. When present for such and not attending work, the submissive/slave must prepare lunch in the afternoon and dinner in the evening for master. This will be mandatory unless instructed otherwise. Additionally content of meals must be of the master's choosing from ingredients available at the time.

B: The submissive/slave must no less than once per month perform a thorough cleaning of the home interior and exterior with minor cleanings in between. Cleaning shall consist of sweeping or vacuuming floors. Of scrubbing dishes, objects or surfaces. Housekeeping is also to include laundry of clothing and bedding for both submissive/slave and the master. There shall be no specific schedule for housekeeping and as such will not be expected to a meticulous degree nor everyday without fail.

C: The basic rule of thumb for the submissive/slave to follow in regard to domestic service is that messes must be taken care of as they happen and all items or supplies used must be returned to the rightful places when no longer in use. If the master's home or any property therein should be lost, stolen, damaged or destroyed as a result of the slave/submissive's actions or actions of a pet in their possession then said home and property must be replaced at the submissive/slave's expense. The same shall apply to the property of any guests visiting the master and persons outside the home.

D: The submissive/slave shall be expected to care for plants and animals of the home at any time  the master is unable or does not feel inclined. This is to consist of feeding and watering plants or animals as well as grooming or trimming where applicable. Additionally included is walking and exercising or playing with pets.

E: The submissive/slave, if in possession of a vehicle must make it available for use at any time it is requested when not attending work if employed. The submissive/slave must be capable of providing transportation and assistance in shopping and other monthly errands as well as other unscheduled events or emergencies as they may occur. 

10. The submissive/slave must have an abundant and healthy sexual appetite. They must be capable of matching the appetite of the master when in the mood and receptive to his desires. They shall offer their body to the master whenever requested to use as he sees fit and for his pleasure. When the master is unoccupied, when there are no guests and when the submissive/slave is not performing another task they are encouraged to be physically affectionate. They are encouraged to behave in a flirtatious manner to invoke the master's arousal. To satisfy the master's libido the submissive/slave must additionally be willing to explore, to expand their horizons and thresholds.

Antisocial Networking / Re: FN Users Panic About Cub Porn
« on: May 31, 2016, 07:13:17 pm »
I've always wondered about how stuff like this is enforced.

the strength of the enforcement is inversely proportional to the popularity of the artist plus a random factor based on how the enforcer is feeling at the time

Antisocial Networking / Re: FN Users Panic About Cub Porn
« on: May 27, 2016, 08:09:19 pm »
hi, just a reminder that the "inkbunny is for pedos" thing literally came from dragoneer back when FA stopped allowing cub porn

Antisocial Networking / Re: Oops, FA Got Hacked (Again)
« on: May 24, 2016, 09:44:17 pm »
there is a lot of misinformation out there about how FA stores its passwords, let me try and clear it up

As of 2011, and vaguely covered on my lj, FA had 2 password hashing schemes. We'll call them Bozo and Krusty.

Bozo used 128 rounds of OpenBSD's password hash, and the same salt for every user. The use of OpenBSD's $2a$ crypt makes an attacker's job slightly harder, in that more computation is necessary to crack a single password. Using the same salt, however, makes the attacker's job easier: if FA used a salt per user, a dictionary/precomputation attack wouldn't work (it'd take up too much space), nor would someone be able to tell if you used the same password as another user.

Krusty fixed the salt problem, kinda. It kept using a static salt, but it also salted a per-user string along with a hash of your password. But then it goes and uses 1 round of a hash that nobody's ever heard of, or uses, called WHIRLPOOL. This makes an attacker's job EXTREMELY easy, because now it's just 2 hash operations: once to MD5 your password, and then once to WHIRLPOOL the two salts and your password. Compare that to the 128 rounds Bozo used, and suddenly the fact that they got salting right is unimportant, because you can brute-force 64 times as many passwords in a given amount of time. And that's assuming a full round of Krusty costs the same amount of CPU time as 1 of the 128 rounds in OpenBSD's hash.

So, someone can check the unsalted hash to see if your password is the same as someone else's thanks to Bozo, and someone can massively parallelize a brute-force attack against the database thanks to Krusty. Now they're using bcrypt, which is impossible to fuck up. Unless you put it into place after a massive database leak... Oh.

Antisocial Networking / Re: Oops, FA Got Hacked (Again)
« on: May 21, 2016, 09:05:10 pm »
Second, what the fuck why did it only take a day to figure out what passwords were?! That really implies they're using a super outdated algorithm and that ain't cool.

Apparently their, um, algorithm was this.

Code: [Select]
sha1(crypt(password, "d67c5cbf5b01c9f91932e3b8def5e5f8"))
In other words, FA's threat model was people armed with computers which were considered outdated a decade ago.

i already wrote about this on my LJ in fuckin 2011 i could go on, but,

nobody paid attention then, why would they pay attention now

Nobody talking about how Kage apparently threw a fit and refused to do his stumbledrunk storyhour at BLFC because the con was screening that new documentary that makes fun of him?

he "missed his flight"

iirc i said "an hour of someone on stage farting would be a better use of the timeslot" or something to that effect

Scandal! / Re: BLFC - Headbutt, punch and arrest for a man
« on: May 17, 2016, 10:55:40 pm »
agreed, prost is just background noise

Antisocial Networking / Re: Oops, FA Got Hacked (Again)
« on: May 17, 2016, 10:25:50 pm »
Pi, can we get a copy of the FA source?

t fate i hope you don't take me for the kind of person who'd grab a random flash drive and plug it into my machine

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